Followed Redux
by KatyRye
Summary: Sara is attacked by a man who Grissom had been pursuing for months. He begins to stalk Sara as way of acting out revenge... M-T ... This is a reworking of an old story
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys, Once again I am blowing dust off of old stories. I know I have a lot of WIPs, but the more variety I have the better I feel! I found that if I have just one story to work on , then I get depressed. So, I am branching out. This is my old story , 'Followed'. I reread and thought 'Jesus … this needs a reboot'. This is told from Sara's point of view.**

 **~8~**

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Nights were a mother's time to relax, or that was what I used to think. My name is Sara Grissom. I am married to a world renowned entomologist, Gil Grissom. We live in Las Vegas and we have a toddler named Emily. I used to work alongside my husband at the Las Vegas Crime Lab, but after I became pregnant I decided to raise our daughter. It was one of the biggest sacrifices of my life, but it was worth it. I am now able to experience a happier part of my life, one that had been missing or that I had never seen before.

After I laid my daughter to sleep for the night, I would see Gil off to work and then begin my routine. It begin with a mug of tea and an hour of television. Then I would read a chapter out of my book. And Finally I would lock up and head for a shower. We had a dog, a boxer named Hank, who would, at that time, settle down on his oversized plush dog bed and go to sleep.

My life had been so predictable, up until that night.

My shower was exhilarating, that much I remember. I felt the stressors of my day wash down the drain and I imagined the passionate morning I had had with my husband. He was quite the skilled lover if he was able to keep memories alive in my head for this long.

At that moment, I heard a loud crash come from the direction of the living room. I swore under my breath, positive that it had been Hank. He had a knack for jumping up onto the table if he smelled the slightest scent of leftovers.

I quickly shut off the water, knowing that I needed to hurry before Emily woke up; unless she had already. I didn't know, at that time, how my night was going to turn out. In the back of my mind, I keep turning scenarios over in my mind. If I had done something different, just one little thing, then this would never had had happened to me. I wouldn't be telling you this story either.

I strode quickly into the front of the house, we had carpet so my steps were muffled, but Hank was nowhere to be seen. He wasn't on the table, nor in his bed. His barking caused me to turn and that was when I noticed that someone had let him into the back yard.

"Hank?" I said, walking to let him back in.

A hand gripped my wrist. "Don't move," a gruff voice said as his hand came down over my mouth.

~8~

After he was through, I am not too sure I want to relive the details again, he left. He didn't stop to go through our things, he didn't go back towards Emily's room, thank God, but that didn't mean that he didn't steal something that night. He had assaulted me… raped me. I didn't know who he was or what he wanted.

Everything was sore; he had gotten a few hard punches in as I struggled. I touched my hand to my mouth and pulled back a palmful of blood. I grabbed a towel from off the counter, unaware that I was sobbing, I wiped my mouth and ran my tongue over my teeth; one was loose. I didn't want to touch the place between my legs, it felt like it was on fire and I didn't know what I would tell Gil. I knew I had to, but somehow I felt shame. I felt like I had let this happen to me.

I grouped for my phone and was greeted by the image of Gil holding Emily on his shoulders. I had taken that picture only a few days ago. I had been so unaware that this would happen to me. I dialed Gil's number and waited for the call to connect. For some reason the thought of telling him what had just happened to me seemed unbearable.

"Hey," his happy voice said when the phones connected. "How is your night going?"

I didn't say anything; I just froze. I heard people talking in the background as he waited for a response. I heard the distant voices of Catherine and Greg; my old friends. I wanted so badly to forget it, hang up, and move on. Telling someone wouldn't solve anything, but I knew that that wasn't true.

"Honey?" he asked, his voice lower.

I took a deep breath and pressed the dishcloth to a gash under my eye. "Gil," I choked out. "I need you… to come home."

I was still unaware of how much I was sobbing, I would learn that later when I started to recall details. For now I wanted, no I needed, him to come home. I needed him to hold me and tell me what was happening. I have been on the reverse side of this coin before, and I never thought I would be.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his happy tone had vanished. "Is it Emily? Tell me."

"No," I choked out. "She's alright. Gil, someone… broke into our home."

"Okay," Gil said. "I'm on my way home. Stay on the phone with me. Is he gone?"

I nodded. "Yes, he's gone."

I felt weak. I wasn't usually this shakable. I had always prided myself on being firm and rock-like; never scared of anything. Until this happened. From this point on, I began to doubt myself. I began to question who I was and if I had deserved what I got. I felt as if someone had stood over me in a conquering way.

I knew Gil was on his way, he changed the subject to Emily and the new things she was learning. I listened, appreciating the way he was trying to distract me, but I wondered if he knew what had happened. When I think back on it, I think he may have. He never really told me, but I assume he had an idea. After all; he knew who was responsible.

~8~

When Gil came home, he had to use his key. It is funny to think that a man who breaks into your home and rapes you is polite enough to lock the door behind him. He called my name, but I wasn't really listening. My back hurt, my legs hurt, and I wanted to vomit.

He found me in the kitchen, laying curled with my back to the wall. He flipped on the overhead light and I squinted into the brightness. When I saw his face, I knew then that someone was there to take care of me and that I had a right to withdraw temporarily. That was how I chose to handle the situation at the time; I withdrew.

"Sara," Gil soothed to me as he lifted my head up to look at me. "I called an ambulance."

" _You did?"_ I remember thinking.

"Did he?" Gil asked.

I looked away from him, unsure of how to answer. Do I admit to letting a man assault me? My body was, and is, only meant for one man. How can I tell my husband that someone else had been there?

"Hey," he said, pushing my hair behind my ear. "This isn't your fault. Can you stand?"

I shook my head. I didn't even need to try and stand; I knew that my legs were exhausted. They were still shaking.

~8~

I am not too sure how much time it too for the ambulance to arrive; everything around was dream-like. Gil had gone back into Emily's room and had dressed her. He came out with her in his arms and he let me hold her. She was still drowsy from sleep and wined at the amount of noise in the room.

"Shhh," Gil said as he lifted her back up.

"Where…?" I said.

"Mom can take her," Gil replied. "I called the school and they said she'd be waiting for her. Catherine will take her over; I'm not leaving you."

I nodded and let the paramedics secure me to the stretcher. I didn't want to be wheeled out like an invalid, but what choice did I have; I could barely walk.

As they wheeled me out of my home, I closed my eyes. I heard Catherine say something to Gil in passing and I imagine that Emily had been passed over to her. I didn't want my baby to be with Gil's mom, I wanted to be in my bed, I wanted all of this to vanish.

~8~

At the hospital I had an SAE kit done and it was collected by one of my co-workers, I don't know who and I didn't ask. I turned to my side and mentally documented my injuries: stitched-up laceration on face, multiple bruises, broken rib, and a hairline fracture on my pelvis. I was a mess.

Gil had stayed with me through everything. He updated me about Emily, who was now asleep in the little bed her grandmother had bought and kept at her house.

"Are you hungry?" he asked me, brushing a thumb over the gash on my face.

I shook my head. The thought of eating anything made me sick. I wanted to go home and scrub the kitchen, erasing any evidence that he had been in my home. My kitchen was now a small crime scene, being worked by day-shift.

"When can we go home?" I asked him.

Gil gave me a kiss. "They want you to stay here for a little while," he said to me. "just rest."

He stayed by me until I fell asleep, but my last waking thought was of him squeezing my hand and kissing it ever so lovingly. The look in his eyes reflected rage and sadness.

~8~

After Sara had drifted off to sleep, Gil stepped out into the waiting room to speak to Brass. His friend was sitting in one of the hard plastic chairs, sipping coffee from a styrofoam cup.

"Did Ecklie send day-shift out?" he asked.

"Yeah," Brass answered. "Gil, this could just be a coincidence."

Gil shook his head. "It was him, Jim," he said. "I know it."

For the past few months, Gil had been on the heels of a serial rapist and murderer name Ronald Bezkin. He had finally gathered enough evidence and the D.A agreed to prosecute. Bezkin knew who he was and he threatened Gil before he was taken into custody. However, somewhere down the line someone broke the chain of custody. Under 'The Fruit of the Poisonous Tree Doctrine' all of evidence was deemed inadmissible.

"I'm not leaving my family alone until we catch him," Gil said. "I don't care how we get him, just get him."

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~8~

 **A/M: Time for me to call it a night. I have a life to live tomorrow; wish i didn't. Love you all. Good night, and, like always, good night. REVIEW :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Dear Readers,**

 **I am so glad you l am so glad that you like my reduxes (Redi) . I love these stories, but they really needed airing out. I have 'Absentia' finished on paper, so all I have to do is put on my laptop and upload it. I love you all. Keep reading.**

 **~8~**

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For the record I want you to know that I love my husband very much. He and I have been through a lot together and I think that each of us would be lost without the other. With that being said, the fact that he wanted me to leave Emily with his mother pissed me off. I hated him for a moment, but in hindsight I realize that it made me feel like I couldn't do my duty as a mother.

I was released from the hospital late the next day, but I was instructed to use the support of a crutch for the next few weeks. I had to ride to the car in one of those foolish wheelchairs, I was fully capable of hobbling along just fine.

Gil's mother lived on campus at Gilbert College; a school designated for the hearing impaired. While the area was extremely safe and Gil's mother was more than kind, I wanted my daughter home with me. It wasn't fair that I was the one who had to suffer, but looking back it was actually what was best at the time. I wasn't aware of how bad things were going to get.

Emily knew very little American Sign Language, but then again she also knew very little English. I had picked up as much as I could, but I am sure I sounded odd to Betty Grissom. Betty loved Emily and dotted on her, like grandmothers should. I wish I could say the same about my mother, who was currently living in a human development center.

When she opened the door to us, I was greeted by one of her usual concerned looks. It was one of the same looks I received when I explained that Emily was being raised a vegetarian. Gil signed his greeting to her and gave her a hug.

"Emily's in her toy area," she signed to us.

A grandchild having a play area was new to me, but then again I had no grandparents I knew of. I deducted that Betty thought she'd never have grandkids.

"Where are her things?" I signed as best I could given that I had a crutch under one arm.

"Honey let's sit down," Gil said, motioning for me to take a seat at the table.

I looked at him suspiciously. "I really want to get on home," I said to him.

I didn't mean to sound rude around Betty or ungrateful of the fact that she took care of Emily, but I wanted to start my daily routine again. I thought that the sooner I was back to normalcy, the better I would feel.

"Sara," Betty signed to me as she patted my hand. "Why don't you let me keep Emily? I like being with her and I think you need to pamper yourself. Or better yet, let my son do it."

I was so torn; part of me wanted, no needed, a break. The other part of me just wanted to hold my child. I looked over a Gil, who must have seen the worried look in my eye.

"It'll be like a little rest," he said and signed. "We can go to a spa or have movie nights. It'll be relaxing."

I was angry at them both. I thought that they were trying to run my life for me, or that they thought I was too weak to do it. I couldn't bring myself to argue with them, after all it was mother and son versus daughter-in-law.

~8~

I let Gil, let being the keyword here, take me back home. I visited with Emily for a few moments, but she was too occupied with her play kitchen to concentrate on me. Betty promised me that she'd stick to her diet and then we left.

When I stepped through the front door of my home, I noticed that it felt quiet. Gil had cleaned up the mess, my blood and whatever had broken. I didn't want to step into the kitchen, so I headed back towards the bedroom.

I tossed my crutch on the floor and lowered myself to the bed. The doctor had given me an assortment of pain medication and for a moment I just wanted to sleep. I wanted to forget everything that had had happened. But inside I was afraid to dream.

"I'll make you some tea," Gil said as he brought me a glass of water to take my medicine with. "or do you want some warm milk, maybe?:

I shrugged. "I guess tea," I said dryly, not really wanting to answer.

He kissed me on my head and left to make the tea, leaving me alone with the ringing silence. I didn't want his attention. I didn't want him to spoil me. I felt so like my ego and pride had been crumpled up like a paper towel and thrown down a garbage disposal.

~8~

Gil stayed with Sara, holding her until she fell asleep. When her breathing changed and she began to snore softly. he slipped away from her and picked up her empty tea mug.

He was livid.

He dug his phone out his jacket pocket and dialed Brass. It wasn't a mere coincidence that someone broke in to attack Sara hours after he left for the night. Somebody knew his schedule and they also knew he wouldn't be back.

"How is she?" Brass said when the phone connected.

Gil stepped out onto the back patio. "She's sleeping, but I can tell she's shaken up. She's on the edge," he explained. "Tell me you found something."

"Gil, it isn't television," Brass said. "we're working as hard as we can, but the best thing you can do right now is wait on Sara to remember something. That is one of the few chances we have if it is Bezkin."

"Who has the case?" he asked.

"Ecklie gave Catherine a week with it, but after that it's out of our hands. We all love Sara and he's afraid it'll cloud our judgment," Brass explained.

"I better not find him first, Jim," Gil said. "Cause I'll kill him."

~8~

My dreams were rough. I kept seeing this dark figure in my home, but this time he was in every room. I managed to run back to Emily's room in my dream, but she was gone and the dark figure was there. No matter how fast I ran, or which room I entered, the dark figure was always there. He eventually caught me and, though I couldn't see hands, I felt them on me. I felt him tear the robe from my body again. No matter how loud I screamed, no one came.

I must have been whimpering in my sleep because when I woke, Gil was shaking me gently. I sat slowly, wincing from the pain in my ribs. He smoothed my hair back and brought a cup of water to my lips.

"Thanks," I said dryly.

I wanted to gulp the liquid down, but after a few gulps he set it down. He cupped my face with his hands and looked into my eyes. What did I look like to him? Did I look like a used, beaten-up old tire?

"You hungry?" he asked.

At time, I didn't see anger in his eyes. But now that I look back, that was exactly what I saw. I saw pure, unadulterated hatred and anger.

I grimaced. "I can't," I said, pushing him back a little. "I need a shower."

He let me stand, but I still felt his hand on my helping me balance a little. I hobbled, sans crutch because it was bruising my armpit, into the bathroom. I locked the door behind me, afraid that Gil would come in and see my bruised body. I didn't need to see it myself to know what state it was in, I could feel the pain. I didn't want him to see the body that he always desired framed by bruises and bite marks. I wanted him to remember my body as it was: flawless to him.

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~8~

 **A/M: Hello again readers, I am trying to keep on writing, but it is just so hard with this new hairdo! It feels so glossy…**

 **Please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Dear Readers, I am hoping to bring you some good work this weekend. I know, we are all saddened by the final day of the CSI shooting - all ships included- but it will be ok. We will all stay in the fandom and one day, we will be greeted by new fans. Let's keep the faith. CSI is over, but not really. They will issue a big box set soon and we will have a new collection of extras and bloopers. It will be OK. A lot of us will not stop writing, making videos, and other things. I love you, and the pain has been felt in Mokpo, South Korea. I wish I was in Central Time ( My old time) to actually BE with you guys, but we are still together. We can always cosplay, and meet up, and other things. Don't worry.**

 **~8~**

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I'm not really a fan of therapy, I am not saying it is bad; it's just not for me. I have seen it work wonders for a lot of people. We had a few department therapists when I was a CSI, but I thought that having a stranger dive into the deepest realms of your mind was a violation. It was Gil who convinced me to go to a few sessions, and the only reason I actually went was to prove to him that I was fine so that we could bring Emily home.

"And how did you feel when you woke up this morning?" the therapist, a woman, asked me.

It had been a week since my attack; a week without Emily. Gil had stayed home from work and tried to pamper me in any way he could. We went for a couple's foot massage, had romantic dinners, and had talked long into the night. He never mentioned my attack nor did I.

I shrugged. "I felt nothing," I said. "Just like I have every day. I don't want to talk about anything or think about it. I just want to pretend nothing happened; what good can come of me talking about it?"

My doctor wasn't a bad person, in fact she was very patient and polite. It wasn't her fault that this happened, but it also wasn't min; or was it? Was it my luck to have these unfortunate things happen to me?

I stood with my bag. "Time is up," I said. "I'm going to visit my daughter today."

~8~

I respected Gil's mother. She had a challenge raising a boy on her own while being deaf. Betty's condition caused Gil to grow up in a quiet world. I am not too sure if a mother, who has been so close to her son, ever really accepts a daughter-in-law.

"How are things going?" Betty signed to me.

Emily was sitting in a booster seat at the kitchen table. She was busy shoving cubes of cheese into her mouth. I sat down my purse and pulled a chair up close to her. My daughter is my only chance to do something right in my life and I didn't want to miss another moment.

When Emily had been born, I had barely let Gil hold her. I wasn't prepared for the wave of love and protectiveness that washed over me. It was as if at that moment, I knew that I was meant to be a mother.

"It seems to be going alright," I signed back.

Betty took my hand and gave it a pat. Gil set three mugs of tea on the table and took an empty seat beside his daughter. Emily looked to both of us and I snuck a piece of celery off of her plate.

"Mom, Sara and I are going to take Emily home with us today," Gil signed.

Something about his motions told me he didn't want Emily to come home. He hadn't told me about Bezkin at that point, but I sensed something. If I had known, I would have left my child with her grandmother.

Betty looked from Gil to me. "Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yes," I signed quickly. "I miss her. She makes me feel whole; I need her to come home now."

~8~

Having Emily home did distract me. I found myself concentrating more on my daughter's needs rather than my own worries; Gil even seemed to relaxing more. The child's innocence and trust in her parents gave me the strength I needed. It reminded me that I had someone smaller me that needed me to hold onto my sanity.

After dinner, I started her bath and dropped her toys into it. One of these was a rubber-duck that she cherished above all other bath toys. I added bubbles to the water, tested the temperature, and went to gather Emily for her bath.

I walked into the living-room and saw a sight that warmed my heart and sent warm shivers throughout my body. Gil had taken Emily out of her chair and was holding her close to him. She was relaxing in his arms, a sign that she was worn out from her eventful day. He was swaying her gently from side to side.

"Daddy missed you," he said softly to her.

I didn't want to interrupted- being away from her was as hard for him as it had been for me. He loved his daughter and was a good father to her. He turned and saw me standing in the doorway.

"Is her bath ready?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yeah,," I responded, still warmed by seeing him nurture our daughter. "Will you give me a hand?"

~8~

I wanted to make love with my husband. I needed to feel him and thank him for everything. Not being able to do such a natural thing was terrible. I laid quietly beside him for a long time that night, listening to him breathing and wanting to roll over and pull him into me. That was another thing this intruder had done; he put a wedge between me and my husband physically. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore.

"Gil," I whispered turning over so I could face him. "Are you awake?"

"I'm just thinking," he replied.

I scooted closer to him and he put his arm around me. "About what?" I asked.

I felt so warm being next to him. I wanted to bury my face in his shirt and cry for our moments that had been taken from us. I didn't want to push myself, but I want to tell him how much he meant to me.

"About you," he said. "How I let you down?"

This caught me by surprise. "What… Gil, you didn't let me down."

Gil sat up and turned the beside light on. Light flooded the room and I could see that his face was worried. He looked at me with eyes that were asking forgiveness.

"Honey, what's the matter?" I asked.

"I want you to know that I didn't know that this was going to happen," he said, reaching for my hand.

I looked at him oddly. I thought he was being dramatic. It was rare that he grew so serious about something. The last time he spoke to me this way was when he talked about taking Emily to get tubes put in her ears.

"Gil, just tell me," I said. "It can't be as bad as -"

"I know who did this to you," he said abruptly.

I sat there stunned. At first, I didn't understand what he told me. How could he know? If he knew then why wasn't he calling Brass? I pulled my hand away from him and shook my head slightly.

I blinked. "What?" I asked, sure that I had misunderstood.

"I've been working with Jim to build a case against a man named Ronald Bezkin," Gil explained. "I had enough evidence to prove he was a murderer and a rapist, but somehow the evidence got thrown out. Before he went into custody he threatened me. He told me I had a pretty wife."

I stood up, my legs shaky. "Where is he now?" I asked, my voice getting higher.

Gil looked helpless. "He was released," he admitted to me lowly.

I felt myself growing angry at him. The loving feelings that I had had for him earlier were being replaced. If I couldn't trust Gil, who could I trust.

"Why are we still in this house?" I asked, pushing past him and heading to the closet to get a suitcase.

My body was starting to numb, I didn't really know what to say to him. I tore a suitcase down from the top shelf and threw it on the floor of our walk-in closet. I pulled shirts off of coat hangers, I wasn't too sure what I was grabbing.

"So you just left Emily and I alone?" I asked. "What if he hadn't stopped with me? What if…"

I didn't want to finish that sentence, I turned and continued to throw clothes into a suitcase. I felt his hand touch my arm and I slapped a hand back at him.

"I didn't know he was out," he said. "I didn't know until the next day and I had just arrived at work. I should have turned around and come straight home. If had known what he was doing to you."

"That he was violating me?!" I asked, throwing an armload of clothes at him. "That he was hitting me and saying horrible things and,.. everything!"

I tried to walk from the room, but my foot tripped over the suitcase and I tumbled to the ground. Gil took my arm and tried to help me stand, but I pulled myself from his hold. I had no idea what I was supposed to be thinking or feeling. I just felt rage.

For a moment, I think I had actually lost my mind. I don't remember even thinking about my actions, I just know that I picked shoes up off the floor and threw them at him. I don't know if they hit him and I don't know where they landed.

"You need to go!" I said to him, still trying to keep my voice down.

"I can't leave you and Em here," he said. "I'm not going to."

I brought my knees up and cradled my head. I cried, in that position, for a long time. I couldn't stay angry at him, he didn't know it was going to happen and he thought Bezken was in custody.

"Why did you wait to tell me?" I asked more calmly.

Gil took my arms again and this time I let him help me. I winced at the pain in my ribs and pelvis.

"I didn't want to scare you even more than you were," he said. "I don't want you and Emily here when… if…. I go back to work. Bezkin waited for me to leave."

I looked down at the clothes strewn all over the floor and sighed. "We need to leave," I said. "We need to take Emily and go tonight."

~8~

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 **Well folks, I have to go to sleep. It's been a long day at the old pepper mill. Please send your love ( psst that means review).**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello everyone, thanks for all of my reviews. I have made a change in my previous chapter and I want to apologize if I offended anyone. I hope this chapter goes well for you. I love all of you… yes … even the ones who do not review… I see you guys….I know you're there…. and I hope you enjoy :)**

 **~8~**

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 **~8~**

Even though it was late, I didn't want to stay in that house another moment if Bezkin knew where we lived. Emily, of course, didn't like being moved around. She whined during our drive to the hotel and by the time we had arrived, she was rubbing her eyes and kicking her legs. Despite how fast we packed up and left, we remembered to pack her play pen.

She was getting too big for it lately. If I didn't keep a sharp eye on her then she would climb out and I'd later find at our desk paying bills. We still used from time-to-time if we traveled, but I knew its days were numbered.

I laid her down with her sippy-cup, while Gil called Brass to let him know we had left the house. I didn't know it then, but he was having the house patrolled.

Most parents believe that their child is the most perfect gift. Emily was beautiful and when she grew up, I knew that I was going to have a problem. She had my attitude, which my mom categorized as 'spunky with no-nonsense'. Her face was shaped like Gil's and she had dark curly hair.

"Nite-nite," I said to her.

I was still angry at Gil for keeping the truth from me for so long, but I willed myself to empathize with him. Something terrible had happened to me, his wife and best friend, that he was taking the blame for. He didn't need me blaming him too. I heard him in the room's small kitchen, talking to Brass in a low voice.

"Yeah, she seems alright," I heard him say.

The room had a single queen-sized bed. It was smaller than the one had at home, but I couldn't complain. My irritation almost convinced me to throw a pillow and blanket on the floor for Gil, but that would have hurt him. After all, he needed to be comforted too.

I climbed into bed and made myself as small as possible, hoping that Gil would think I had fallen asleep. I didn't want to make up with him, but I also didn't want to keep on fighting. It was as if my brain was in some state of limbo.

"Ok, yeah," Gil said from the kitchen. "I'll call you back tomorrow."

I didn't like feeling this way- afraid to fall asleep- but I did. I felt the bed shift and the sound of Gil putting his phone down onto the bedside table. He cleared his throat and I knew that he knew I was awake.

"Are you still angry with me?" he asked softly.

I didn't want to answer him. My exhaustion was overwhelming and I didn't want to get into an argument. I pulled my blanket up around my shoulders, but soon I felt his warm arm drape over me.

"Please don't be," he whispered into my ear. "I love you so much."

I felt my anger melt away. He showed me that he loved me every day. The way he spoke, carried himself around me, and the way he cared for our daughter showed me that our life was important to him.

"I know you do," I answered back, my tone matching his. "I love you too. And no… I'm not angry anymore."

I heard him sigh with relief and I rolled over so that I could face him. He brushed strands of stray hair out of my eyes and I could only imagine what he was seeing. The bruises on my face had lightened, but were still visible. I knew I looked horrible, but he looked at me with the same love in his eyes that I saw every day.

I pulled his head down gently and I pressed my lips to his. It hadn't occurred to me that I hadn't kiss him, with full blown passion, since before my attack. His lips felt so warm against mine and I felt my need for him return. I felt his beard against my cheek and I broke our kiss long enough to nuzzle its roughness. I love my husband, I always will.

"You smell so good," I said to him.

I let him lower his head to my neck and kiss softly. "Are you… sure?" he asked between kisses.

I nodded in response. "I want to feel normal again," I said.

I pulled him closer to me and buried my head in his chest. I felt him position himself over me gently. That was when I froze and felt a wave of nausea wash over me. I gagged and sat up quickly.

"It's okay," he said to me, rubbing my back. "We don't have to."

But I _wanted_ to. I needed to feel my husband all around me and inside of me. I needed to have that comfort and peace, and I knew he did too. When Gil moved over me, I just kept seeing this dark shadow of a man holding me down.

"I want to try again," I said, wiping tears out of my eyes.

I felt Gil pul me into him and we laid back together. "I'm content just holding you," he said, kissing my head.

~8~

The next morning I woke up to Emily attempting to climb onto the bed. It was much too high for her so I sat up slowly, my pelvis screaming at me, and lifted her up with a groan.

"Mommy's escape artist," I said as I cuddled her.

I lay back with her for a few moments and looked over at Gil. I smiled wickedly and set Emily down beside him.

"Wake daddy up," I whispered.

The child happily obliged and grabbed a handful of her father's hair. She gave it a tug and squealed with satisfaction. Gil opened one eye and fixed his sights on me.

"What did I ever do to you?" he joked sleepily.

I laughed and pulled Emily back into my arms. "Nothing," I said. "I just missed you so I sent a messenger."

Emily wiggled in my lap so I set her on her feet. She shot across the room and over to the cup she had dropped. She shook it and brought it to her mouth, tilting her head back as she did so. Gil threw back the blanket and checked his phone's home screen.

"Em, it's seven in the morning," Gil informed the toddler

Emily looked like she couldn't care less and sat down with her cup. I kicked back my blanket and debated getting out of bed. For a moment I hoped that Emily would opt for a nap and we could all three return to sleep.

"I left some files at the house," Gil said as he climbed out of bed. "Do you want to come or stay here?"

I didn't hesitate for a moment. "Are you kidding me?" I asked. "We're staying together."

* * *

~8~

 **This is a very very poor update in my mind. Oh… the boring chapter that must be the 'bridge' chapter. It is 2:30 am… do you know where your cats are. Review if you have time.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Wale Wale Wale… it is 12:16 am Monday morning. Let us see see what time it is when I am finished.. If I stay off of facebook, this may take an hour. We will see.**

 **~8~**

 **Author's Note**

 **~8~**

* * *

 **Chapter 5**

 **~8~**

"Alright," Gil said as he pulled into our driveway. "I'll be in and out. Five minutes, tops."

I unbuckled my seatbelt. " I want to get a few things," I said.

Gil looked hesitant, but he never could stop me from doing what I wanted and he knew it. He gave me a nod and climbed out. Emily kicked her legs happily, excited to be home.

I was relieved as well, even if it was only for a moment. Gil and I bought our home after Emily was a few of months old. We had been living in a two-bedroom apartment and we hadn't planned on having a family. We had just assumed that we would be a childless couple, but life had different plans. After Emily was born, I fell so deeply in love with her. Our lives took a complete turn and I can't imagine not having her around.

After a month of trying to raise a baby in our cramped apartment, we decided that it was time to get a bigger home. I had scoured the market for weeks and then finally found a four bedroom home within our price range. It was far from Gil's work, but truthfully I didn't care. It had a huge back yard and was a place we could raise our little girl. Maybe even a little boy some day… if I could talk Gil into it.

"We're not staying long," Gil reminded me as he set Emily on her feet and took her by the hand.

"I know," I said as we walked up the porch steps.

"One… two… free...poor...pie," Emily counted as we ascended.

"Go back to the car," Gil said to me, passing Emily to me.

I was confused. "What?" I asked.

I looked at our door and my heart jumped into my throat. It was standing ajar, but I hadn't noticed. I picked Emily up and backed down the stairs.

"Gil!" I hissed back up at him.

I knew what he was thinking. He drew his gun and pointed to the car. I turned on my heel and trucked a kicking Emily back with me.

"No… no!" Emily whined to me, pointed towards the house.

I didn't want to sit in the car and wait while Gil walked into a potentially dangerous situation, but we had Emily to think about now. I couldn't leave her unprotected, nor would I bring her into the house with me.

I slid into the driver's seat and locked the doors. As I waited I talked nonsense with my daughter.

~8~

After Gil saw Sara climb into the car and lock the door, he toed the door open and raised his gun. The living room, which had been cleaned and organized when they had left that night, was completely destroyed. The couch was flipped over, the books were stren all over the room, and the photos of Emily - that usually hung on the wall - were smashed.

The kitchen was the same mess. The food from the refrigerator and cabinets were all over the floor and Emily's high chair's upholstery was slashed to ribbons. The only thing not disturbed was the clock that hung over the back door that led to the patio.

They had taken Hank to a 24-hour board, so it was impossible that he had made such a mess. He was an obedient dog that, besides the occasional shoe, never destroyed anything in the house.

"Who's here?!" Gil called out, going back towards the bedrooms.

The bedrooms were just like the rest of the house: destroyed. The decorations on Emily's walls, that Sara had painstakingly applied, had been ripped off the wall. Most of the child's stuffed animals had been ripped open and white cotton lay in piles.

Gil looked everywhere: under every bed, in every bathroom, and behind every door; there was no one in the house. Finally he put away his gun and pulled his phone out.

"Jim, it's me. Someone has destroyed my house," he said.

~8~

I sat there, unaware of what my husband was finding and worried about what he would. In my mind's eye, I saw him finding the dark shadow man in the bathroom and being killed. I wanted him to come out of the house so that we could leave. Finally he emerged, but he looked enraged. I opened the door to the car and waited on him to walk over to me.

"Everything is destroyed," he told me.

"He was here in our home?" I asked.

How long after we left did Bezkin come? Had he been watching this entire time and destroyed our home to send us a warning, or did he come to kill us and destroy the home in a rage when he discovered that we had gone? Either way, if we had been their when he had arrived, then all of us would have been killed. He would have waited until we had fallen asleep and the…

I shook my head to keep that stream of thought from continuing. That had been happening a lot since my attack, the worst possible scenarios would play on a loop in my mind.

"Did you call Brass?" I asked him.

Gil nodded. "Yeah," he said, taking Emily and coaxing me back into the car. "We need to wait in the car."

~8~

After Brass had left with Gil's statement, an officer stayed and waited while we rooted through the house. We packed whatever we could truly salvage and decided to travel outside of Las Vegas. It was obvious that Bezkn had more than a typical vendetta against Gil. He hated him and wanted to hurt him. And that meant hurting me and Emily.

I cried as I packed up some of Emily's clothes. A blanket that my mother had made, when she was able to make things, had been torn into two pieces. I collected both pieces and put them away. In our bedroom our wedding photo had Gil's face cut out of it. I looked for the small piece, but didn't find it. We had other photos, but it was the principle that angered me.

When we were all packed we hit the road. The car was packed full and Emily made her opinion known. She didn't understand why we weren't at home. She was used to a stable life. We went on vacations a few times, but she had a routine.

"Mommy no!" Emily cried at me.

I ached for her, but it couldn't be helped. Instead I rummaged through the glove-compartment until I found her favorite CD and slid it into the CD player.

* * *

~8~

 **Author's note**

 **Well, I guess I can stop here. It is 1:12 am. BOOM! I did it! Leave me a review, please. They make me happy, but I respect your decision not to.**


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